These days, I wake up excited to find a late-night voice message from Lorraine. I am trying not to be a stalker, but I do live for these updates from my college girl. She and I are learning how to keep in touch even with opposite sleeping schedules (or does she sleep?) These days she sends me lovely beach pictures, questions she’s carrying, stories of new friends and adventures, and even a snippet of Compline service; and I praise God for his faithfulness to her so far from home.
These are the days when I say “take your vitamins,” and “eat your fruits and veggies” often, and “Was that a cough? Do you need some elderberry syrup?” (the dramatic ones run and hide when I say this.) We take our immune systems more seriously these days. Like everyone, we fear the two-week time-out that could come for any of us these days.
Community is precious these days. Tuesdays are “community days” with our co-op, and on those days we learn what community can be, centered around a curriculum full of goodness, truth and beauty. We collect words like “brobdingnagian” and questions like “What is success?” and “If you punch yourself and it hurts, does that mean you are strong or weak?” and “What makes a good debate/discussion?” and “Is every debate worth having?”
Piano songs fill my home these days; Seth has been playing Sundays for Faith Lutheran for over a year now, and we have watched his skill and his joy in music increase exponentially. Sometimes, he interrupts practice to go start the Rav4, the car he and grandpa restored, waiting patiently in our yard until he is finally 16. The boy is not so patient. He is ready for wings.
Agnes got her wings recently, and these days she drives a green smart car to the zoo and back for her job. Her dramatic skills get to shine at Boo at the Zoo four nights a week this month! She’s a little extra tired these days. “Text me when you get there,” I repeat, and she does, faithfully. She laughs at me when she comes home late nights. In the struggle between exhaustion and mom anxiety (will she be safe on the roads?) exhaustion wins, and I am asleep when she arrives home safely these days.
Community is precious at our church, too, these days, and we enjoy face to face fellowship as much as possible. The Word in this place continues to go out faithfully, and God’s people feed on it, savor it, discuss it, and are upheld. It’s a smaller crowd these days. But God’s faithfulness has not changed. I still collect “nerd words” my husband says and tease him about them when I get home. I still want to high-five him after some of his sermons.
Should Ralph have punched the bully? Should Billy have shot the ghost coon? Marcus is required to wrestle through literary questions these days, so he chooses fighting, shooting, adventurous questions whenever possible. His drive for action and explosions is mixed with a drive to protect, defend, and forcefully push back against evil, and I am rather surprised to see the beauty here. I am grateful for a husband who knew this was coming, who told me not to fear long ago when I saw the soldier's soul in the toddler. He’s going hunting next month with his grandpa, and he can hardly sleep for the excitement of it.
Meanwhile, Eldon nurtures a pumpkin seed into a tiny plant, even though it is the wrong time of year. On rainy days, he rescues worms trapped in puddles, and he feels sad for the dead crawdads. This is beautiful, too, and if I didn’t already know it, he would have convinced me with the hundreds of stunning natural treasures he’s captured with his camera. These days, all Eldon wants is simple food, time outside, and a growth spurt.
What to say about Peter these days? He’s teaching himself a couple languages for fun, ahead in math, great at research, terrible at reading a room. He’s skilled in the art of being the pesty little brother. His life feels very hard to him, and he needs frequent naps. He finds chore lists to be especially heavy these days, and while it looks like his shoes are too big for his feet, the truth is that his feet are too big for his body, and he’s all around awkward, these days.
Josh has a little more time and brain space these days, as he’s finished his dissertation (he still needs to defend it.) He’s found new energy for home improvements these days, and we have a lovely fireplace insert to show for it. His kids are calling him “old” these days, and me too, too, but we just shrug, kiss a few times to make them uncomfortable, and then I go back to doing my plantar fasciitis exercises.
I am hungry these days, but I’m learning more about how to manage a body and soul and life. Sometimes I choose connection over carbs and Scripture over sugar, and I am beginning to understand more of what it could mean to be satisfied. I am a child in these things, but my Lord welcomes children, so I try to go to Him when I get overly fussy.
There is a hole where Lorraine once was, and we are counting the days until her visit (16). Aggie’s work schedule is starting to leave holes as well, I cannot help but see the changing seasons everywhere I look. Though I’ve been tired at night, I have also been quicker to say yes to a Narnia read-aloud, and to snuggle the younger ones when they ask, because these moments could really be lasts.
But it’s OK. There is beauty in the next seasons. I have already gotten to see some.
The undercurrent of God’s faithfulness holds us steady.
This is true in these days,
and will be true in the days to come.
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