The age of wonder

what next, brother?

Ah, age two, and age three.  The age of questions:

Exciting questions.  Messy questions.  Stupid questions.

I wonder what would happen if I dumped this?
I wonder what would happen if I threw that?

I wonder what would happen if I squeezed a tomato?

I wonder what would happen if I dumped THAT?

(Mom sighs.)

 I wonder what would happen if I hit the baby over the head with a pot?

I wonder what would happen if I colored on the counter? The table? A library book? 

I wonder what would happen if I turned off the TV during his favorite show?

I wonder what would happen if I hit my brother in the head with a train?
I wonder what would happen if I lassoed the baby?

(Ruckus ensues! Siblings react!  Mom gives a long lecture... sometimes worse.)

I wonder what would happen if I refused to come to dinner?

I wonder what would happen if I refused to eat?

I wonder what would happen if I refused to swallow?

I wonder what would happen if I refused to sit?

I wonder what would happen if I held a grape in my mouth for an hour?

(Mom decides whether to pick the battle.  If she picks it, I lose.)

I wonder what would happen if I pinched mama?

I wonder what would happen if I rode on the baby's back?

I wonder what would happen if I pretend I'm deaf?

(Mom wonders if I am aggressive, curious, or just unteachable.)

I wonder what would happen if I threw my plate?

I wonder what would happen if I throw my eggs at my fancy sister?

I wonder what would happen if I chew my eggs and then spit them on the floor?

(Mom will withhold food.)

I wonder what would happen if I tried to bite through the pack of hotdogs?

I wonder what will happen if I whine?

I wonder what will happen if we wrestle in a grocery cart?

I wonder what will happen if I grab something off the shelf?

I wonder what will happen if I grab a passer-by?

(Mom sighs, moves faster. Threatens our visit to "Chicken Nuggets.")

I wonder why mom goes to bed at 8?