Dear Sin-Sick Soul

Dear sin-sick soul,

soul afraid,

soul staring wide-eyed at death, 
at sin exposed:

You there, with the knees sore and hands dirty from weeding, weeding, always weeding... are you discouraged, when the weeds keep coming back?

but I'm such a big helper!

Do you fear because of the strong ones, the ones that will not give up their roots? You pluck off the top and cover the rest, you smooth down the surface, but you know what is underneath. The roots, growing stronger, too strong for your hands or even your shovel. You fear the day when it breaks through the surface again, where everyone can see.

Stop it.

Just... stop.

You are not the gardener.

You are in the Gardener's care.

It is God who will finish this thing.

Those weeds that seek your destruction, that sin-sickness that threatens to devour you-- it is too much for you. But it is not too much for Him.

Safe in His grace, let His Word diagnose that ugliness, and fear it, fear it so that it will drive you to Him, to help and healing.

Lay down your tools and your crutches, and see the powerlessness of your own two hands.

Be still.

Wait on the Lord with open hands and infested heart.

Wait- and remember who you are.

Who- by grace- you are.

You are a child of God, weak and loved.

You are covered in the perfect forgiveness of Jesus.

Your sins have been answered for with His own blood,

blood that gets down to the deepest roots, destroying evil and growing new life.

Your sin-sickness, your terminal illness is no match for Him.

Jesus came precisely for this: to seek and save the lost-

to seek and save YOU.

It is God who will finish this thing.

And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you 

will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

Phillipians 1:6

---
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.

(1 Peter 5)

originally published 5/2014

Held in Peace

 "And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, 

will guard and keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." 

Philippians 4:7

Doesn’t it seem strange to talk about “peace” in this place where tornadoes destroy and babies die? What is this peace that we have in Christ? Does the peace of God somehow lift us above the fear and grief that is part of the human condition?

Christians suffer, in body and in spirit in this place.

We are not given the peace of the Stoic. We are not told smile when all is well, and smile when the cancer is terminal. We are not told to close our hearts to that which could disturb our peace. We do not experience a mystical inner collection with God that allows us to weather the storms of this life like immovable statues. No, we flip and fly with the winds, much like the rest of the world.

In our experience, we who have peace with Christ often do not feel very peaceful at all, not in this place.

Christians suffer, and yet there is peace in Christ.

Those who are not in Christ are like a kite unfettered; free-wheeling through the sky; vulnerable to the winds and the elements. The crash is inevitable. The flight is terrifying.

We who have Christ are like the kite held by the strong father.

We have peace with God, and yet we live in this fallen world for a little while longer. 

We are still assaulted by the winds.

The rain falls, and some of the turns make our stomachs lurch. 

We may even feel as if we are careening out of control, and we brace for impact. 

But even in the worst of storms, we are tethered to a Rock.

We are held fast by Him who loves us.

As we flip and fly in this life, we know that nothing that assaults us can force us out of his hands.

He will hold us fast.

And one day He will reel us in, to Himself. 

He will bring us to our home of forever peace, in perfect safety.

Until then, even as we flip and fly, His grip is our peace.

photo credit

His grip is our peace.

You may also enjoy: Devotions by Emily and My Weakness/His Strength

Just Come

Then Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. 

Whoever comes to me will never go hungry,

and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.

But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe.  

All those the Father gives me will come to me, 

and whoever comes to me I will never drive away. 

For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me.  

And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, 

but raise them up at the last day. 

For my Father’s will is that everyone 

who looks to the Son and believes in him 

shall have eternal life, 

and I will raise them up at the last day.”

John 6:35-40

What does God require of me?
COME.
Not behave, then come.
Not fix my heart, not sort it all out. Not buck up. Not be strong.

Just. Come.

And He says "whoever comes I will never drive away."

Think on this with me today. Read the verse again slowly.

Don't skim.

It is God's will that whoever comes to Him
(Me! You!)
shall NOT be lost,

It is God's will that we come,
and
It is God's will that we are cared-for,
kept safe in him,
redeemed and restored and healed and helped,
and finally, raised up on the last day.

We are in His hands. We only need "come" and He will do the rest.

Let's rest in that today.

Father,

You invite me to come to You, through Your Son. Melt my stubborn heart, and teach me to come to you as your child. Grant me a heart that repents, trusts, and clings to You in all things.  Keep me safe in Your grace, that I may know Your peace. Amen.

(reposted from 9/12)

Behind the mask: an angry, needy girl who is NOT fine.

“I taught people around me that I had no needs 

and then I was secretly angry with them for believing me.” 

Grace for the Good Girl, p. 13

This seems to be a problem for “good girls.”

We work hard, we meet needs, we do the job in front of us, and we do it well.

We do it with eager hands and a smile, or we try to, and when we don’t feel like smiling we smile anyway. We get done whatever needs to be done. We are the responsible ones, the strong ones, the ones people come to with their problems. We like this reputation. We love living up to this expectation. We love encouraging, helping, and coming through in a pinch.

We love making peace, putting people at ease, and lifting burdens.

We hate the opposite.

We don’t want to be involved in conflict.

We definitely don’t want to be the ones causing it.

We don’t want people to be uncomfortable or angry or upset about anything. We make peace at all costs.

We especially don’t want people to feel angry or upset at us, so we morph like amoebas to avoid others’ unhappiness.

We don’t like seeing people with burdens that we can’t lift. We pile them on our shoulders.

We don’t like to add to anyone’s burdens. We pretend we have none of our own.

Ever.

We’re fine.

And we’d really like to be fine. We are trying very hard to be fine. We don’t mean to be dishonest… we just really, really don’t want to be anything other than fine. And we hope if we pretend to be fine for just a little longer, we really will be fine.

When we are alone in the dark, we might whisper a prayer to God for help, but if He tries to provide help by sending us an actual person for us to lean on, forget it.

Too uncomfortable.

Too hard.

We don’t want to be a burden.

So we hide. We wear masks. We ache.

We get angry when people don’t realize it, when they believe the masks we wear.

But we don’t know how to take the masks off.

As the author describes,

“Our desire to be the good girl, the good Christian, 

the good wife, and the good mom becomes the number one priority, 

and Jesus isn’t even in the room.” P. 32

Jesus isn't even in the room.

 What does that even mean?

Photo by Shalinee Kohli Murishwar:

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If He were “in the room,” wouldn’t He just be standing shoulder to shoulder with that “good girl” in my head, that perfect version of myself that I never am? Wouldn’t He be standing there with His arms crossed, glaring at me like she does, telling me to do better, to try harder?

Wouldn’t He take her side?

No, He wouldn't. And this makes all the difference.

Jesus has compassion on us.

He opens his hands to tired, tangled “good” girls, and invites us to just come. Rest. Receive.

He sees through our masks right into all the ugliness, and still He says, come.

He takes our failures, our Fs, and our sins and buried them deep in His wounds.

He gives us His own robe of righteousness to wear, and He gives us His A +.

Our stubborn insistence to do it all on our own, in our way, on our strength, begins to be washed away in the flood of His love.

We learn to receive love from Him and from others, and we receive so much more than we give.

It comes down in a shower of grace, and we are refreshed.

Jesus Christ came to save sinners, to pour out his mercy on all people.

He came for you, and He continues to come for you, that you may have life and have it abundantly.

Father,

Forgive us for chasing expectations and guarding our reputations, 

for people pleasing and making ourselves slaves to guilt, 

and for doing even "good" things out of fear, not love.

Our works are filthy rags.

Refresh us with your mercy, and teach us to rest in Your goodness.

Help us to see the ways you care for us, 

in Your Word, 

and through the people you send into our lives.

We dare pray these things because of Jesus alone.

Amen.

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Do you have trouble admitting when you're not "fine?"

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