Data Analysis: Needs and prognosis

A Brief Overview of Needs and Prognosis of each child who endured Mommy Experiment #1 performed 4/14/11

(Click here to read more about the mommy-fit experiment.)

Advice is based on data from said experiment, but authorities in no way claim responsibility for the accuracy of this report, or the outcomes of said children.  Let it be noted that parenting is not an exact science.

The Instant Repenter
Needs: sympathetic leadership, affection, grace, and a little more sleep. 
Prognosis: Current soft state of heart indicates a promising future child of God.

The Smarter Smirker
Needs:  Reminder that even big kids are kids under authority, and proof that authority figures are wise to smirk-hiding
Prognosis: Because this child shares mother's failings of patience with the younger children, it is likely that age will melt her smirk into compassion for motherly weakness.  Teenage years will be exciting, but general outlook good.

The Terrified
Needs: A hug and a nap
Prognosis:  This one loves and fears the Lord and authority, and so shall do well.

The Sibling Checker
Needs: Firm direction mixed with hearty wrestling affection.
Prognosis: Child shows every sign of becoming a Smirker in his own right.  Watch and pray and fear.

The Smirker
Needs: Firm direction, a regular outlet for physical adventures, and frequent reality checks.
Prognosis: Highly Uncertain.  Antisocial behavior comes naturally to this one.  There is no indication that the smirk will ever be removed, even with drastic surgery.  Research is underway- perhaps experts will learn the secret of channeling the smirking spirit in directions beneficial to the community.

The mother: Needs:  Work on self-soothing measures, occassional mental health breaks and personal days, and a place to hide when personal days are not possible.
Prognosis:  She will survive these years at home with boys, but she will not be unscathed.  Those who love her can expect a little weariness and a little "crazy."